Armie Hammer Is a Cannibal?

According to images purporting to be DMs and texts between the Call Me by Your Name actor and various women, Armie Hammer apparently has a fetish for drinking his partners’ blood and fantasizing about mutilating them. Shared by anonymous social media accounts, the intimate messages include shocking details of Hammer’s sexual kinks.

Addressing one woman as “kitten” and referring to her as his slave, Armie Hammer — or someone writing as him — talks in these messages about fantasizing about violent assault, holding his lover’s living heart in his hand, cutting off a toe to keep in his pocket, and drinking blood. At one point he refers to himself as “100% a cannibal.”

Armie Hammer has denied that these messages are genuine, calling them “bulls**t.” Nonetheless, he has chosen — possibly with some encouragement encouraged — to drop out of his role in J.Lo’s upcoming film Shotgun Wedding, in order to address what he calls “vicious and spurious online attacks” and to stay close to his family.

The rumors have prompted some to look back at Hammer’s previous comments on his sex life. In an interview with Playboy in 2013, Hammer referred to himself as a “dominant lover” and expressed his desire to engage in more aggressive sex than he felt comfortable having with his then-wife Elizabeth Chambers.

And last year, while promoting Rebecca, Hammer was asked which historical figure he would most like to have dinner with, and his choice was 18th century philosopher Marquis de Sade, whose writing on violent sexuality is the source of the term “sadism.” Of course consenting adults can do whatever they like with each other — as long as no one gets seriously hurt — but the DMs come along with allegations that Hammer used his fame to manipulate younger partners into participating in his twisted fantasies.

With that said, are you sure you’re not just dreaming all of this? While Armie Hammer definitely gives off some Patrick Bateman-meets-Homelander vibes, doesn’t it all seem a bit on the nose? And is “Armie Hammer” really a name?

In case this is all just a dream, it’s worth figuring out what it means. According to our dream dictionary, dreaming about an actor or celebrity indicates something about our own ego, and dreaming about cannibalism relates to feeling consumed by something in our lives.

So when you wake up from this one, you might want to consider whether you’ve been letting your ego run your life. You don’t always need to take yourself so seriously.

Tig Notaro in a Zack Snyder Zombie Heist Movie?

Back in January a slew of allegations came out about comedian Chris D’elia pursuing and sexually harassing underage girls. In response to the credible accusations against him, D’elia was cut from his role in the upcoming Zack Snyder film Army of the Dead and replaced by…comedian Tig Notaro.

For those who are unfamiliar with Notaro’s work, she is best known for her TV show One Mississippi and for her famous stand-up set, Live, both of which deal with her experience with breast cancer and her mother’s death. Notaro is a gay woman whose deadpan approach to sharing the intimate details of her life is about as tonally distinct from Zack Snyder’s high-energy dude-on-dude violence as it’s possible to be.

Add to that the fact that Army of the Dead is a movie about a group of mercenaries planning a casino heist during a zombie outbreak, and the whole thing starts to sound a little too ridiculous for real life. And yet, the first images of Notaro in Army of the Dead came out this week.

Our dream dictionary tells us that dreams about zombies have to do with emotional detachment, and dreams about comedians are a sign that we need to be more carefree. So, when you wake up, consider how you may have been shutting yourself off from your emotions, and how you can take a more relaxed approach to your feelings.

Elizabeth Smart on Masked Dancer?

On Wednesday’s episode of The Masked Dancer, the dancer disguised as a moth was revealed to be none other than Elizabeth Smart. Smart became nationally famous in 2002 at the age of 14, when she was abducted and held prisoner for more than nine months before being rescued.

Why did a TV show that’s supposed to be about disguised celebrities choose to feature a woman who is famous for being kidnapped as a teenager? Either because she wanted to raise awareness of the Elizabeth Smart Foundation and her activism and advocacy on the topics of human trafficking, assault, and sex education, or because you’re dreaming.

Our dream dictionary says that dreams about kidnapping are about having having your essence sapped, while dancing represents freedom, and moths are symbols of the hidden aspects of our personalities. So consider how hiding certain aspects of yourself might be wearing you down. You can choose to be free.

Donald Trump Impeachment Redux?

Wait, haven’t we done this before? Donald Trump was impeached last year, right?

Well, apparently we’re doing it again, because inciting a violent insurrection is considered a faux pas. And Nancy Pelosi even wore the same outfit.

Our dream dictionary tells us that recurring dreams are the result of persistent issues that we are ignoring or failing to address. So if you’ve been putting off addressing some major issue in your life — especially a fascist, white supremacist, self-aggrandizing issue — your dream is telling you that it’s time to confront it.