Despite popular opinion, apparently the requirements for being People’s Sexiest Man Alive are extensive. The publication speaks with famous women and focus groups, while also taking into account social media discourse.
And then there are factors like consent and enthusiasm that play in. Of course, the Sexiest Man Alive has to actually accept the honor and participate in the photoshoot with pride.
But, for a long time — just about forever, actually — People has gotten it wrong. It rarely is the man that the internet is speaking about…In fact, it’s normally a man that the internet used to speak about.
This year’s winner is John Krasinski, who you may know as Jim from The Office or from films like A Quiet Place. He’s famously married to actress Emily Blunt, but…
Is he really this year’s sexiest man alive?
This is not about looks by any means. To each their own. We each have different types and that’s okay, but—
I’m talking about relevancy.
By this logic, men like Glen Powell, Josh O’Connor, Mike Faist, Pedro Pascal, and Paul Mescal should have won this not-so-coveted award.
Musicians like Bad Bunny and J.Balvin, chart toppers like Harry Styles, actors like Timothee Chalamet and Jeremy Allen-White. Saltburn’s Jacob Elordi or Barry Keoghan.
I’ve now named a dozen men who would be more logical choices for People’s Sexiest Man Alive.
A lot of it is about promotion. John Krasinski has three projects releasing in 2025 (A Quiet Place Part III, Jack Ryan, and Fantastic Four.)
Last year’s winner was Patrick Dempsey — a less controversial choice — but even People admitted a delay in awarding him.
However, Dempsey had movies like Ferrari and appearances in the Dexter: Original Sin prequel to promote. Smacking his face on the cover of People makes for boffo promo for his projects…A win-win.
Allegedly, People also takes philanthropic and activism efforts into account. Michael B. Jordan — the 2020 winner — was a prominent figure in the Black Lives Matter Movement and campaigned for women’s rights.
Look, I get it. Appearances are subjective and we shouldn’t give two ticks about the Sexiest Man Alive. But here’s the thing: if you’re going to do it, do it right.
Give it to the Man of the Year. The one who constantly has thirst traps made for him on TikTok.
And I understand that People’s Sexiest Man Alive must be willing to wear this (dubious) crown…but you have to wonder if these men are paying for the title at this point.
