Music

Harry Styles Releases the Horniest Video Ever for “Watermelon Sugar”

Harry Styles Releases the Horniest Video Ever for “Watermelon Sugar”

We’re entering week bajillion of social distancing, meaning many people haven’t felt the warm touch of another human being in a very long time.

Some days that feels pretty manageable–enjoyable, even. After all, why shave in quarantine? Your cat isn’t going to mind rubbing up against your cactus-calf in bed. But on other days, like the days we watch Normal People on Hulu or the day Jake Gyllenhaal posted that video where he tried to put a shirt on while upside down, it’s excruciating.


Unfortunately, even with some states starting to lift some social distancing guidelines, it’s going to be a long time before touching one another freely (with consent, of course) is acceptable. As we all waste away on our couches and basically get engaged to our respective vibrators, Harry Styles decided to make our state-enforced celibacy all the more challenging by dropping a brand new music video for his hit song “Watermelon Sugar.”

The three-minute long video is basically a compilation of technicolored shots of Styles touching and being touched by beautiful, sun-kissed humans. There is so much touching in the video that Styles literally dedicated it to “touching.”

dedicated to touching watermelon sugarHarry Styles, YouTube

We see goose bumps rise on bare bellies as hands skim along them, we see multiple women making faces of ecstatic pleasure, we see Styles in a sea of writhing, gorgeous bodies all reaching to caress him. The video is unabashedly sensual, with watermelon serving as a not-very-subtle innuendo. The whole thing feels like a quarantine-mania fueled dream of everything that this summer won’t have: time spent in crowded public places, the messy sharing of food, and touching. It practically feels like Harry is mocking us, painting a delicious looking portrait of what we can’t have. But then again, perhaps it’s good motivation to continue to socially isolate. The better we socially isolate now, the more quickly we can get back to normal life. And who knows, maybe post-quarantine life will mean messy, fruit-filled beach parties full of beautiful people for all of us, right?

Watch at your own risk.

Harry Styles – Watermelon Sugar (Official Video)www.youtube.com

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