Imagine if you had a massive following on Twitter (maybe because, hypothetically, you were the president of the United States or something), and you tweeted something scientifically inaccurate that had the potential to negatively affect thousands of people’s lives.
Let’s say, for example, that you thought a hurricane was going to hit a state that it was not in danger of hitting, despite there being no evidence to back you up.
Again, purely hypothetically, what if that state’s National Weather Service (for argument’s sake, we’ll pretend it’s Alabama) responded like, “Nah dawg.”
If it were you, a sane, rational person who does not have a personality disorder, you would most likely say, “Whoops, my bad, I stand corrected. Here is the accurate information.” Too bad you’re not the president. Because if you were Donald Trump, you would double down. Hard.
See, Donald Trump couldn’t accept the fact that he was wrong about the chance of Hurricane Dorian hitting Alabama. So he broke out an outdated National Hurricane Center forecast from nearly a week prior (that still did not show the storm hitting Alabama) and altered it with a Sharpie. See that extended black circle around Alabama? Yeah. That’s literally Sharpie.
While some have noted that it may be illegal to alter official weather maps, mainly this is just proof that we are currently living in the stupidest version of reality.
Now, #TrumpSharpie and #Sharpiegate are trending on Twitter, and people are imagining all the other things Donald Trump could prove with a Sharpie. It’s magical.
For instance, here’s Trump’s proof that the US army really did take over British airports during the Revolutionary War in the late 1700s.
Here’s Trump’s proof that he really does have bigly hands.
Here’s Trump’s most recent hole-in-one from his daily taxpayer-funded presidential golf outing.
And here’s a candid shot of Trump on the course looking like an absolute unit, as usual.
Here’s some solid evidence that Trump actually destroyed Hillary in the popular vote.
And here’s how Trump is polling incredibly well against every possible Democrat nominee for 2020.
Turns out Trump wasn’t lying about his crowd sizes, either!
Trump also officially completed the border wall. This is a fact, with photo receipts.
Trump never knew dead pedo-trafficker Jeffrey Epstein, either. He never even met the guy once.
Lesson learned. If you want to be president, just lie about stuff and then draw sharpie pictures as evidence. Too easy!
Oh, and someone did this. It’s not like the rest, because Donald Trump would never actually sharpie it. But oh man, it’s just so good.
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