CULTURE
An Interview With the Redditor Who Lost a Bet Over the Mueller Report and Ate an Entire Jar of Mayonnaise
03 Jun, 19
Last Wednesday, Robert Mueller gave a press conference clarifying that his report did not exonerate Trump, essentially imploring Congress to move forward with impeachment proceedings.
But while the Mueller Report and Trump’s possible obstruction of justice are serious business, Reddit tends to focus on the lighter side of things. Such was the case when a user named Ayn-_Rand_Paul_-Ryan (ARPR for brevity’s sake) posted in an r/politics thread titled “Mueller Reminds the Nation That Trump Betrayed the USA.”
“If 1 in 1000 Americans have read it I will eat an entire jar of the cheapest nastiest mayo on stream…” wrote ARPR, lamenting how few Americans have actually read the Mueller Report for themselves.
“Oooooh, get that mayo ready! Around 30 out of every 1,000 Americans have read the entire Mueller report!” responded another user.
Many people would have abandoned the thread at this point, leaving their hyperbolic bet to waste away unfulfilled. ARPR is not that kind of person; ARPR is a man of his word. And so he made good on his bet and filmed himself eating an entire tub of mayo.
For the record, the entire Mueller Report can be read here, and every American who cares about their country should take the time to read it.
Popdust got the chance to sit down (virtually) with ARPR and discuss his incredible, mayo-eating feat of the human spirit.
Where do you see yourself and your legendary mayo tub falling within the great scope of political heroes, from MLK to Gandhi, who have taken action when nobody else would?
Oh, I would never imagine to rank myself anywhere near those magnificently brave people, I simply made an offhand comment that I was absolutely sure was true. Mainly because I expected only a tiny handful of people to even have read just the [Mueller Report] summary.
At best, I consider myself a person willing to keep his word. To me, it is just what everyone should do.
Why a jar of mayo? What made you come up with this bet in the first place?
I was mentally going down a list of nasty to eat things that wouldn’t actually be dangerous or unsanitary. Just imagining the reactions people would have thinking about someone spooning lump after wobbly lump of mayo into their mouths totally made it the obvious choice.
The last three years have revealed to me just how little engagement the average American has with our political process. I never imagined that there would be an actual poll showing that roughly .3% of Americans had read the full redacted Mueller Report. In a way, the elation of learning that I may be wrong spurred me on to honor the bet.
What do you think your livestream will accomplish? Why would people want to watch such a thing?
Several redditors have replied with something along the lines of, “Just secretly swap it with pudding,” and that got me thinking about all the other fakes that have happened on reddit in the past. I remember how let down I felt after following their stories just to have them disappear or turn out to be scams. These little slice-of-life, silly internet moments that arise organically…that’s one of the things that makes the internet so amazing: wondrous variety and a low barrier to entry.
Why do you think it’s so important for people to read the Mueller Report for themselves?
I think that far too many people allow others to make their decisions for them. Let me be clear that this isn’t a partisan issue. It is very easy to pick a talking head on whatever media platform one uses and just adopt their judgment frameworks, values, and ideals.
So when something as important as the Mueller Report, or a U.N. report on Climate Change is made public, I feel it is absolutely necessary that all people read it and come to their own conclusions first before being told by their media celebrities what they should think.
I’ve had more than a few friends suffer a moment of shock once they realize that maybe some of the things their chosen news sources have told them might not be accurate or objective. And in every circumstance it has made them more thoughtful and less extreme in their viewpoints. Yet this only happens when they see with their own eyes and think with their own minds.
Any closing words/message?
Everyone: Vote!
Seriously! Midterms, locals, primaries, not just the big Presidential Election. Do your research, qualify your candidates yourself so you can make the best choice.
Now, here’s ARPR eating an entire tub of mayonnaise:
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