Welcome back to “Now in Theaters: 5 New Movies for the Weekend.”
This weekend we have an UglyDoll musical for some ungodly reason and spinning umbrella blades.
WIDE RELEASE:
Long Shot
Long Shot (2019 Movie) Official Trailer – Seth Rogen, Charlize Theronwww.youtube.com
Charlize Theron is the US Secretary of State in the midst of a presidential campaign. Seth Rogan is a schlubby, unemployed journalist who she babysat when they were kids. A chance encounter leads to her impulsively hiring him as a speechwriter, kicking off a totally improbable romance amplified by the globetrotting lifestyle of her career. This is the first major rom-com to hit theaters in a long time. With a major emphasis on comedy and two solid lead actors, Long Shot seems like an especially fun watch, especially if you miss the era where every weekend brought a new rom-com to the big screen.
The Intruder
THE INTRUDER – Official Trailer (HD)www.youtube.com
In this weekend’s dose of obligatory horror, a young couple moves into their dream home out in the country, only to discover that the previous owner (Dennis Quaid) keeps coming back. The premise is actually pretty scary, considering that this is a real thing that happens. When I was a kid, the last guy who owned our house just showed up in the backyard one day to look at the flowers outside. He looked a lot frailer than Dennis Quaid, but it was still creepy.
UglyDolls
UglyDolls Trailer #2 (2019) | Movieclips Trailerswww.youtube.com
Remember those UglyDoll plushies from the 2000s? Well, they have their own movie now, and for some absolutely bonkers reason, it’s a musical. Now you can watch Blake Shelton sing about body acceptance through the guise of a one-eyed green blob monster. Gabriel Iglesias is also billed, so you know the comedy is going to be terrible. I’m unreasonably confident that this movie is going to be an absolute dumpster fire. Just kidding. It’s totally reasonable. Pitbull voices one of them too and he’s never been attached to anything positive in his entire life.
LIMITED RELEASE:
Extremely Wicked, Shockingly Evil and Vile
Extremely Wicked, Shockingly Evil and Vile | Official Trailer [HD] | Netflixwww.youtube.com
From the same director behind Netflix’s Ted Bundy Tapes, this portrayal stars Zac Efron as the prolific serial killer. Told from the perspective of his long-term girlfriend, Liz Kendall (Lily Collins), Extremely Wicked, Shockingly Evil and Vile focuses more on Bundy’s psychology and strategies of manipulation than his actual murders. There’s always a glut of content out there for true crime enthusiasts, but it’s not every day you see Zac Efron involved.
Shadow
Shadow Trailer #1 (2019) | Movieclips Indiewww.youtube.com
Yimou Zhang ( House of Flying Daggers) is one of the best martial arts film directors in history. His movies combine incredible action with stunning cinematography, resulting in pure visual spectacles. This time, he’s employed spinning blade umbrellas––a whole platoon of them. I’m not one to judge people based on their opinions, but if that doesn’t excite you then you’re wrong and I don’t like you on a personal level.
Dan Kahan is a writer & screenwriter from Brooklyn, usually rocking a man bun. Find more at dankahanwriter.com
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