Which Ghost Should Ke$ha Have Sex With Next? A Ranked List
Posted by Newson 09/28/2012 at 4:04 PM
In case BOO missed it (hold for laughs), Ke$ha allegedly slept with a ghost. Here’s the thing: Humans don’t usually have sex with ghosts. In both our community and the ghost community, this is pretty huge, scandalous news.
Needless to say, our girl K-e-dollar-sign-ha is going to be faced with her share of spectre suitors. With Saturday night fast approaching, we feel it’s our responsibility to put in our bid for most eligible banshee bachelor. Take a read through our 18 choices for the hottest stuck-between-worlds hookup to get sleazy with K-Money. Why die young when you can mess around with the dead while you’re living? YOLO/YODO.
18. The Headless Horseman
How would they kiss?!
17. The Ghost of Abraham Lincoln Said to Haunt the White House
16. Lloyd, Bartender from The Shining
15. Hamlet’s Dad, King Hamlet
DILF, but definitely smells, right?
14. Bill Cosby in Ghost Dad
DILF, but too silly.
13. Cybernetic Ghost of Christmas Past From the Future
Violent tendencies? No thanks.
12. Jacob from Lost
Bangable, but needs to lighten the eff up.
11. Ghost Rider
B.A. for sure, but ZERO sense of humor.
10. Stay Puft Man from Ghostbusters
He seems fun, but he might upstage her.
9. Bruce Willis in The Sixth Sense
Hot, but wayyyyyyy too introspective.
8. Pac-Man Ghost
She does love neon…
7. The Ghost of Christmas Past
Perfect for someone with daddy issues. We’re just saying, K!
6. Space Ghost
Girls gotta eat…
5. Moaning Myrtle
A little lez action never hurt nobody…
4. Ghostface Killah
Brainy, with a hint of danger. Worth the risk of dating a fellow musician?
A friendly ghost could be good for her! Help ground her, bring her partying under control. But would she eventually resent him for that?
2. Patrick Swayze in Ghost
Now we’re talking. Brave, tortured, arty. But he’s no…
He’s batshit, he’s clever, and he has a wild sense of style. Most importantly, he never looks any worse the next morning than he did the night before.
Just say it three times, Ke$h-Ke$h!
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