When you’re sourcing material from British tabloid The Sun, returns vary. You can either get truth, half-truths, sorta-truths planed by sources, or complete nonsense gussied up with a few plausible facts. It’s particularly the case for Cheryl Cole, former Girls Aloud frontwoman, erstwhile X Factor judge and tabloid staple, so much that there are extensive dossiers on her appearances throughout the years. She also really wants to jump-start her solo career, which has had fits and starts even in her native U.K. despite having a built-in fanbase and the savvy-if-nothing-else will.i.am as manager.
So what’s potentially-maybe in store for Chezza’s third album? Well, it might include…
Lana Del Rey castoffs?
Says an unnamed, possibly-existent source: “Cheryl is a big fan of Lana and was intrigued to hear she had lots of songs written which she wasn’t going to sing herself. She got hold of one and was really taken with it. The record label are pretty happy about it because Lana has a massive following.” Huh. Side-eye. Eyebrow-raise. Perplexed expression.
Plausibility: Actually pretty damn plausible. One thing about Born to Die that’s been lost amid the successive furores is the number of big names involved. Jeff Bhasker, who worked on Kanye West’s 808s and Heartbreak, My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy, Watch the Throne, Beyonce’s 4, Drake’s Take Care, fun’s Some Nights and countless other albums. (Let’s be real: the backing track for “Diet Mountain Dew” was probably meant for someone else.) Patrik Berger, whose extensive Scandopop credits include Robyn’s “Dancing on My Own.” Sneaker Pimps’ Liam Howe, who writes seemingly everything. Between these three producers alone, there’s probably a ton of decent, workable material.
Calvin Harris collab?
Possibly a separate track, Cole’s said to be working with Calvin Harris, whose “We Found Love” with Rihanna gave him a bigger profile than he’d already gotten thanks to dance-production work. Said the Sunday Mirror of the track, expected to also feature will.i.am: “It’s a huge track and something everybody is incredibly excited about. It’s made for the club scene and a dance classic.” Who would’ve thought it?
Plausibility: May well be a foregone conclusion. Calvin Harris collaborating with a British pop artist? Plus will.i.am, Chezza’s pal? This was inevitable. As for will.i.am showing up, he’s already dragged Mick Jagger out of retirement and made the Louvre his temporary studio. No subsequent will.i.am rumor will ever be implausible.