And there it is. 2011 was a pretty sweet deal for Adele, with the hit album and the songs and the SNL skits and whatnot, but there was definitely something missing: A very minorly substantiated sex scandal of some sort. Well, looks like 2012 is shaping up to be even more of a dream season for Adele—not only is she set to have her biggest sales week yet next week, but tomorrow the internet might get to see her (or more likely, someone vaguely resembling her from certain angles in certain lights) engaged in coitus—with, like, another person—in what would make, to our knowledge, the first Adele sextape in internet history.
As for the likelihood of this being legit…well, let’s say if the sextape was an NFL team, we’d give it a better chance of winning the Super Bowl than the Kansas City Chiefs, but not as good as the Dallas Cowboys. The main source we have for this is French gossip site JeanMarcMordini.com (“C’est une vidéo qui devrait faire beaucoup parler dans les prochaines heures”! Yes, it would give us a good deal to talk about.), while the paparazzo in question, Jean-Claude Elfassi, posted a link to his blog (where the video will ostensibly be posted tomorrow morning) on Twitter—and the link doesn’t even work. (“Le blog devrait revenir rapidement!” (The blog will return quickly!) tweets Jean-Claude.) The credibility of his claims to have “exclusif la sextape d’Adèle”—we don’t need to translate, do we?—isn’t particularly astounding.
Still, in a way it’s probably fairly flattering to Adele that such rumors exist at all. You gotta be pretty big to have scummy international paparazzi fabricating sex tape rumors. And on the off chance it is real—geez, imagine how many copies 21 is gonna move next week.