Rihanna Drafts Personals Ad on "Ellen"

rihanna snuggie ellen

Posted by on 11/18/2011 at 1:46 PM News

The Popdust Files: ellen, rihanna

Rihanna has s0 much to talk about these days, from her new album Talk That Talk and its accompanying chart-topping single “We Found Love” to her role in the upcoming big-screen board-game-adaptation Battleship to her feud with Nicki Minaj that neither artist (or anyone else) probably even knows exists yet. Yet, when the pop star appears on Ellen next Monday, the primary topic of conversation will of course be that old familiar standby—her personal life. The interview, which was taped yesterday, features Rihanna lamenting to the talk show confidant that she’s “not dating anyone right now,” and that she’s “not necessarily happy being single. It’s not really that cool.”

So what to do for the Sexiest Woman Alive when she can’t seem to find a good man? Well, draft up a personals ad as single-guy bait and see who ends up on the line, of course! When asked by Ellen about her perfect man, RiRi provided the following character sketch:

I like men that are more aggressive but mysterious but I like a man to be very sure. I like them to be sure of them selves and know that you’re the man. I’m the lady and the only way for us to make this work is for us to play our roles. You know, I can’t really be the man for you. I don’t want to have to be. I’m the man at work all the time.

Very traditional for the singer, but not necessarily out of line from what we’ve come to expect from her music. She didn’t say anything about loving “long walks on the beach,” though, so unfortunately we’re pretty sure that means we’re out as potential candidates. Maybe Nicki is still available.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=GNAiaErGT-Y

[Rap-Up]

SUMMERTIME ABC’S

Boise Weekly May 25, 2011 | Darr, Deanna THE FUNDAMENTALS FOR A PROPER IDAHO SUMMER Air Conditioning: Key to summer survival in the Treasure Valley is A) having air conditioning, and B) knowing where you can poach the bought air in the unfortunate event of ‘your air conditioning breaking down.

Our favorite cool places include:

* Movie theaters: Catch a chick flick, an R-rated comedy or something with lots of things blowing up. Summer movies keep both the brain and body chilled. See Screen, Page 39 for ideas.

* Public libraries: Use the Internet, browse the periodicals, check out a classic or get the kids to join the summer reading program so their minds don’t fill with junk. For Boise public libraries, check out boisepubliclibrary.org.

* Shopping: Yes, we are actually advocating going to the mall. Even if you’re broke, consider the people-watching opportunities and the cold air.

* Museums: There’s something to be said for climate-controlled exhibits. Visit Idaho State Historical Museum, Boise Art Museum, Discovery Center of Idaho or any of the other area museums. The Museum Pass allows entry to seven participating museums within seven days for $19 for adults and $9 for children. Check out boisemuseums.org/pass. asp for info.

Alive After Five: Summer means interacting with other humans in a social setting, and few places are more social than the weekly Alive After Five concert series on the Grove in downtown Boise. Every Wednesday from June through September, a cross section of Boi??e culture gathers around the fountain to listen to live music – from both national and local acts – do some quality people watching, swill some beer and wine and basically make the scene. See season schedule, this page.

Al Fresco Dining: Not much is better than dining under a glorious summer sky, and the Treasure Valley has plenty of patios to do it on.

Bocce Ball: Not just for Italians anymore. The City of Boise has several bocce courts in area parks. Visit cityofboise. org/departments/parks for info. See Play Page 43.

* Boise Music Festival: All-day free public outdoor concert. Need we say more? OK, Joan Jett and MC Hammer. Seriously. Saturday, July 23, in Ann Morrision Park. Visit boisemusicfestival.com for more details. See more info in Noise, Page 32.

Boise Ree Fest: Summer = outdoor recreation. Outdoor recreation = Boise He?§ Fest. Celebrate all things ree June 25-26 at Ann Morrison j?ark. Get more info and a schedule at boiserecfest.com.

Braun Brothers Reunion: Your family reunions aren’t like this. The three-day music fest near Challis will be held Aug. 11-13 with acts including Micky and the Motorcars, Reckless Kelly, Cody Canada and the Departed and Robert Earl Keen. Hotels are already booked, but you can always camp. Visit braunbrothersreunion.com/home.html for more details.

Camping: Quintessential, inexpensive summer escape. No, we’re not telling you our favorite spots.

Canyon County Fair: There’s nothing like a good old-fashioned fair, and this one has it all: animals, rides, enough junk food to make you regret buying those new jeans a size smaller. The fair runs July 28-31, and concerts this year include Kansas, Tracy Lawrence and Jo Dee Messina. Visit canyoncountyfair.org for more info.

Deli Days: Mark your calendars for the annual celebration of traditional Jewish food. Be prepared to get in line early to snag some rugelach, hamantasch, knish and big piles of kosher corned beef and pastrami. The event runs June 23-24. Get the details at ahavathbethisrael.org.

Drag Races: Burning rubber, screaming tires, roaring engines. Ah, Firebird Raceway. Visit firebirdonline.com for details.

Eagle Bike Park: Mountain bike trails, a BMX track, a jump track and downhill courses … think of it as a grown-up, two-wheeled playground. Visit eaglebikepark.org for more info.

Eagle Fun Days: Celebrating summer, Eagle-style with a rodeo, music, a street dance, family activities, the Wet and Wild parade and, of course, a Rocky Mountain oyster feed. Events run June 10-11. Get a full schedule of events at eaglechamber.com.

Eagle River Pavilion: Outdoor summer concerts this year include Steve Martin and the Steep Canyon Rangers, Michael Franti and Spearhead, Styx with YES, Whitesnake, Trey Mclntyre Project, Prairie Home Companion and Michael McDonald with Boz Scaggs. Visit landofrock.com for details.

Esthetic Evolution: A “community-based, participant-driven music and art festival centered on progressive thinking and selfexpression.” Check it out for yourself the weekend of June 17-19 at Twin Springs near Arrowrock Reservoir. Visit estheticevolution. com for more info.

Farmers Markets: Sure, there’s fresh produce, homemade goodies, flowers, art and crafts, but more importantly, it’s the summer scene at which to be seen. Start with brunch and then do some browsing. Check out markets in Boise, Meridian, Eagle, Kuna and Nampa, among others. Check out Food, Page 44, see BWs 8 Days Out every week, or visit boiseweekly.com and search “farmers markets. ” Fishing: Summer fishing sure beats winter fishing. Get the regs at fishandgame.idaho. gov.

Foothills: Whether it’s biking or hiking, the Boise Foothills are an almost-in-town escape. Get a full trail map online at ridgetorivers.cityofboise.org.

Fourth of July: More American than apple pie. Check out community fireworks displays at Ann Morrison Park, Hawks Memorial Stadium and Meridian Speedway. Boise’s parade begins at 11 a.m. on Monday, July 4.

Gardening: Get some dirt under your fingernails and put some fresh, homegrown produce on your table. Need some help cultivating that green thumb? Look for classes offered at Idaho Botanical Garden (idahobotanicalgarden.org), North End Organic Nursery (northendnursery.com) and Far West Landscape and Garden Center (farwestgardencenter.net), among others.

Gem State Jam: Following in the tradition of really great entertainment in prison … OK, maybe not, but for its third year, the Gem State Jam has an impressive lineup of talent playing at the Old Idaho Penitentiary. This year’s musicians include Cash’d Out, Maria Taylor, Jeff Crosby and the Refugees, Jonathan Warren and the Billy Goats and Old Death Whisper. The all-day event is on Saturday, June 11. Visit gemstatejam.com for the full schedule.

Go Karts: Harness your inner mini speed-demon at one of two valley tracks. Fast Lane (12048 W. Franklin Road, Boise, 208-321-1166, fastlaneboise.com) offers indoor racing with leagues for both adults and kids. Wahooz Family Fun Zone (1385 S. Blue Marlin Lane, Meridian, 208-898-0900, wahoozfunzone.com) features a curving outdoor track.

Golf: Both relaxing and aggravating. See the list of public courses, this page.

Greenbelt: Nothing says summer like cruising along the Greenbelt, which now stretches from Eagle to Lucky Peak Reservoir. Visit cityofboise.org/ departments/parks and click on “Parks and Facilities” for a full map and lists of parking lots with Greenbelt access.

Hawks Baseball: Kick back at the first baseline bar or claim a seat in the bleachers to watch Boise’s own boys of summer. This is a kid-friendly way to spend an evening, so take the whole crew. Get the season schedule at boisehawks.com.

Highland Games: Don’t you dare call it a skirt. The manly men in their kilts will be back on Saturday, Sept. 17, at Expo Idaho for the annual Treasure Valley Celtic Festival and Highland Games. Heavy objects will be tossed, clan history will be celebrated, pipes will be played and we’re guessing just a little beer will be drunk. Best yet, the public is more than welcome to join in. Visit idahoscots.org/festival.htm for the details.

Ice Blocking: Get a block of ice. Go to Simplot hill. Climb up hill. Plant butt on ice. Slide down. Repeat. P.S.: A towel helps keep your bum dry.

Ice Cream: I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream – seriously, we do, even as otherwise rational adults. We get especially excited when it’s homemade ice cream. Check out the map of some of Boise’s locally owned ice cream paradises below.

Idaho Botanical Garden: Cruise through the beautiful gardens in the shadow of the Old Idaho Penitentiary on a summer day, or take in one of the Great Garden Escape Thursday night outdoor concerts. Visit idahobotanicalgarden.org for more info.

Idaho Shakespeare Festival: The play’s the thing – but the stunning outdoor amphitheater and opportunity for a wine-infused picnic don’t hurt either. This year’s summer lineup includes Two Gentlemen of Verona, The Complete Works of William Shakespeare (Abridged), Cabaret, The Taming of the Shrew and The 39 Steps. Get the season schedule and ticket info at idahoshakespeare.org. go to site cody canada and the departed

Jazz Jamboree: OK, so it’s more fall than summer, bur the annual celebration ?°f a” things jazz in Sun Valley is worth planning for. Think of it: five days of concerts by jazz musicians from around the world. Mark your calendars for Oct. 12-16. Visit sunvalleyjazz.com for more info.

Kayaking: While not everyone can kayak, those who can – or who want to – are in the middle of a Whitewater playground. Besides the world-class rivers, check out Kelly’s Whitewater Park in Cascade (kellyswhitewaterpark.com) for some waves and a great place to be a kayak spectator. Kelly’s will soon have competition when the Ray Neef, MD, River Recreation Park opens in the heart of Boise (boiseriverpark.com).

Ketchum Alive: Tuesday nights in July and August have never sounded better in Ketchum, thanks to free weekly concerts in Forest Service Park. Get the details at ketchumidaho.org.

Kite Boarding: Dude, we dare you to strap a wakeboard to your feet and grab hold of a giant sail and hang on. Visit idahokitesports. com for more info.

Lucky Peak: Summer boating. Nuff said.

Main Street Mile: This is your one chance to run through downtown Boise with a bunch of firefighters, mascots and children chasing an ice cream truck, all in support of prostate cancer prevention. Join the race on Friday, June 24. Get more info at mainstreetmile.com.

MK Nature Center: Escape the city hassles along the riparian trail or take the kids so they actually learn something this summer. Visit fishandgame.idaho.gov for directions.

Mountain Biking: Some of the best trails around are playing double duty: ski resorts in the winter, mountain biking Meccas in the summer. Check out Bogus Basin Mountain Recreation Area and Brundage Mountain Resort for some great summer trails. Visit bogusbasin.org or brundage.com for details.

Movies in the Park: Free family movies under the stars. Boise’s movie series is back one Saturday each month (June 18, July 16 and Aug. 20) in Julia Davis Park starting at dusk. Meridian is showing a different film each Friday night in Settlers Park June through August. Check the schedules at boiseschoolsfoundation.com or meridiancity. org/movienight.

Music from Stanley: Live music every Sunday in June through September in the stunning surroundings of Redfish Lake. Get the rundown at musicfromstanley.com.

Natatorium: The place is more than 100 years old and is still the summer place to be with its pool and hydro tube. Let’s hear it for longevity. Visit cityofboise.org/departments/ parks for hours.

Old Idaho Penitentiary: It’s rumored to be haunted, is the site of numerous deaths, was home to some of Idaho’s most notorious criminals and has its very own gallows – who’s up for an educational outing? It’s also home to the J. Curtis Earl Memorial Exhibit, one of the nation’s largest 1 Blue Cow Frozen Yogurt 2333 Apple St., Boise 208-338-1000 bluecowfrozenyogurt.com 2 Delsa’s Ice Cream Parlour 7923 W. Ustick Road, Boise 208-377-3700 3 Fanci Freez 1402 W. State St.. Boise, 208-344-8661 4 Gelato Cafe 2053 E. Fairview Ave., Ste. 101, Meridian, 208-846-8410 gelatocafeofidaho.net 5 Hawkins Pac-Out 2315 N. Bogus Basin Road, Boise, 208-338-9627, hawkinspacout.com 6 Stan s Char-Broiled Hot Dogs 818 S. Vista Ave.. Boise, 208-342-1199, stanshotdogs.com 7 Westside Drive In 1939 W. State St.. Boise, 208-342-2957, cheflou.com collections of arms and military memorabilia. Visit history.idaho.gov/oldpen.html for more info and hours.

Outlaw Field Summer Concert Series: Big names, big concerts, one kickin’ outdoor venue. Visit idahobotanicalgarden.org for details. See the season schedule on this page.

Owyhee Historical Society Tours: Get a personal tour through the history of Owyhee County. Check with the Owyhee County Historical Society to find out when the next tour is scheduled. Find upcoming tours at owyheemuseum.org..

Paddle Boats: Old-fash ioned but big fun. Rent a paddle boat for up to an hour at the duck pond at Julia Davis Park. Visit cityofboise.org/departments/parks for more info.

Pedal for the People: We can’t get enough of bike events. Boise Bicycle Project is hosting Pedal for the People June 10-25. That’s right, two weeks of biker-driven events, including a Franken48 contest and bike-in movies. Get the schedule at boisebicycleproject.org.

Picnic in the Park: Summer isn’t just fun and games, especially for those kids who might go hungry without the school lunch program. The Idaho Foodbank works to fill that seasonal gap with a free lunch program for kids age 18 and younger in 19 area parks. Both the Boise and Meridian school districts also run similar programs. Get info on all the lunch sites – as well as info about volunteering – at idahofoodbank.org.

Pools: Community pools in Boise open on Friday, June 3, the same day as the last day of school. A coincidence? We think not.

Quasar: What better time to stargaze than when you won’t freeze? The Boise Astronomical Society hosts regular classes and stargazing parties to help novices tell the difference between stars, planets, satellites, airplanes and lightposts. Check boiseastro.org for upcoming events.

Rafting: Idaho Whitewater – hell yeah.

Roaring Springs: Waterslides, pools, waterslides and did we mention waterslides? Visit roaringsprings.com for details.

Rodeo: Cowboy up with some old-fashioned Idaho entertainment. The Snake River Stampede will fill the Idaho Center July 16-18. Visit snakeriverstampede.com for info. The Caldwell Night Rodeo will keep the action going on Aug. 16-20. See caldwell-nightrodeo.com for a full schedule.

See Spot Splash: The phrase “dog days of summer” takes a new meaning on the last day of operation for Boise’s Natatorium pool. Once a year, dogs can splash away as a fundraiser for the Idaho Humane Society. Visit idahohumanesociety.org for more info.

Summer Solstice: It starts at 11:16 a.m. MDT on Tuesday, June 21.

Sun Valley Summer Symphony: Some of the best classical musicians gather in the mountains for a series of free public concerts at the Sun Valley Amphitheater. Claim a seat in the amphitheater or kick back on the lawn and enjoy the music under the Stars. Evening concerts run July 24-Aug. 16. Visit svsummersymphony.org for a full schedule.

Suncreen: Wear it.

Sunset/Moonrise Hikes: When the sun sets and the moon rises at the same time, it’s a great time for a hike. Boise Parks and Ree will lead hikes to watch the show from the Foothills at 9 p.m. on Wednesday, June 15, 8:30 p.m. on Thursday, July 14, and 8 p.m. on Saturday, Aug. 13. Visitcityofboise.org/parks for more info.

Table Rock: One of Boise’s favorite hikes begins behind the Old Idaho Penitentiary. There are several options, but all offer great views. Download trail maps at ridgetorivers.cityofboise.org.

Tour de Fat: Celebrate all things twowheeled and non-motorized with live music, a costumed bike parade and plenty of beer. The popular event, sponsored by New Belgium Brewing, returns to Ann Morrison Park on Saturday, Aug. 20. This year, the event will raise money for Southwest Idaho Mountain Biking Association, Treasure Valley Cycling Alliance and Boise Bike Project. Visit newbelgium.com for details.

Tubing: Cool off with your butt hanging in the water as you float your way down the Boise River from Barber Park to Ann Morrison Park. Get the details on this page.

Twilight Criterium: Some of the best bike racers in the world will gather on Saturday, July 16, for the 25th annual event, which keeps spectators enthralled as riders fly around 90-degree corners at top speed. Get the details at boisetwilightcriterium.com.

UFO Party: Apparently, Boise is no stranger to visitors from out of this world (and, no, out of state doesn’t count). Organize your own UFO-watching party – we recommend tin foil party hats.

Undressed: You’ll probably spend your summer in various states of this.

Vacation: We all want one.

Vino: Southwest Idaho is home to a surprising number of wineries, and they can make for a great day-long tour. Visit the Annual Manual Nightlife page of boiseweekly.com for your own tour map or scan this QR code.

Wagon Days: As summer closes out, head to the hills to celebrate Idaho’s mining past with one of the most popular festivals in Sun Valley. Wagon Days runs Sept. 3-5. Check out the parade, classic car show, antique fairs and more. Get a full schedule at wagondays.com.

Wedding Crashing: We’re not condoning it, we’re just saying.

Weiser Fiddle Festival: You think you know fiddling? You don’t know nothin’ until you’ve been to the National Oldtime Fiddlers Contest in Weiser. The annual event draws some of the best fiddlers of all ages from around the world. There are organized concerts, but the impromptu jams around the campground are sometimes the best. This year, the event will be held June 20-25. Visit fiddlecontest.com for info. in our site cody canada and the departed

Western Idaho Fair: More than just 4-H projects and corn dogs – there are rides, too. This year, the fair runs Aug. 19-28. Grandstand concerts for the year include Eric Church, Kool and the Gang, Craig Morgan and Cheap Trick. For more info, visit idahofair.com.

X-Box: For when that sunburn is too raw to go back outside.

Xeriscaping: Come on folks, we live in a desert. Try to use less water. Visit Idaho Botanical Garden’s Waterwise Garden for ideas on what plants use less water, and watch idahobotanicalgarden. org for upcoming classes on the topic.

Yellowpine Harmonica Contest: Each August, the population of the town of Yellowpine swells (which isn’t hard to do, considering the official population is 35) as harmonica players and fans travel from all over for a weekend of music in the mountains. The 22nd annual event will take place Aug. 5-7. For more info, visit harmonicacontest.com.

Zip Line: Flying through the trees, suspended from a cable by a harness, screaming your lungs out-sounds like fun. Zip Idaho offers treetop tours right outside Horseshoe Bend (zipidaho.com). Tamarack Canopy Zipline Tours takes the adventure further north, near Tamarack Resort (tamarackzipline.com).

Zoo Boise: Two words: baby wallaby. If that’s not enough, think of it as your poorman’s world tour: cruise through the African Plains exhibit, head to South America with the new Animals of the Pampas exhibit, head to the farm at the Zoo Farm animals area and then finish it off with the butterfly enclosure. Oh, and the kids kind of like it, too. Visit zooboise.org for more info.

[Sidebar] ALIVE AFTER FIVE 2011 SCHEDULE June 1 Fitz and the Tantrums with Finn Riggins See Picks, Page 23.

June 8 David Lindley with Like A Rocket June 15 Grupo Fantasma with Oso Negro June 22 Brothers Comatose with Sarah Sample June 29 Girls Guns & Glory with Neo Tundra Cowboy July 6 Honey Island Swamp Band with Thomas Paul July 13 John Nemeth with Hokum Hi-Flyers July 20 Anders Osborne with Travis McDaniel Band July 27 Hey Marseilles with Junior Rocket Scientist Aug. 3 Tony Furtado with New Transit Aug. 10 Jim Lauderdale with Bill Coffey Aug. 17 The Ragbirds with Matt Hopper and The Roman Candles Aug. 24 Duke Robillard Band with Dan Costello Aug. 31 Swagger with Central City Music Co.

Sept. 7 Hoots & Hellmouth with Sandusky Furs Sept. 14 Johnny A with Tim Andreae Sept. 21 Bill Kirchen with a.k.a Belle Sept. 28 TBA with Low-fi [Sidebar] GOLF COURSES (PUBLIC ONLY) Banbury Golf Club 2626 N. Marypost Place, Eagle 208-939-3600, banburygolf.com Boise Ranch Golf Course 6501 S. Cloverdale Road, Boise 208-362-6501, boiseranchgc.com Broadmore Golf Course 103 Shannon Drive, Nampa, 208-466-0561, broadmorecc.com Centennial Golf Course 2600 Centennial Way, Nampa, 208-468-5889, centennialgolf.net Eagle Hills Golf Course 605 N. Edgewood Lane, Eagle 208-939-0402, eaglehillsgolfcourse.com Falcon Crest 11102 S. Cloverdale Road, Kuna, 208-362-8897 , falconcrestgolf.com Hunters Point Golf Club 11826 W. Nette Way, Nampa, 208-465-1903, hunterspolntldaho.com Indian Lakes Public Golf Course 4700 Umatilla Ave., Boise, 208-362-5771, indianlakesgolf.com Lakeview Golf Course 4200 W. Talamore Blvd., Meridian 208-888-4080, golflakeviewgc.com Pierce Park Greens 5812 N. Pierce Park Lane, Boise, 208-853-3302, pierceparkgreens.com Quail Hollow Golf Club 4520 N. 36th St., Boise, 208-344-7807 , quailhollowgolfclub.com Ridgecrest Golf Course 3730 Ridgecrest Drive, Nampa, 208-899-4650, ridgecrestgolf.com Shadow Valley 15711 Horseshoe Bend Road, Boise 208-939-6699, shadowvalley.com Warm Springs Golf Course 2495 Warm Springs Ave., Boise, 208-343-5661, cityofboise.org/wsgc [Sidebar] ICE CRCRM [Sidebar] OUTLAW FIELD 2011 SUMMER CONCERT SERIES AT IDAHO BOTANICAL GARDEN Tuesday, May 31 The Moody Blues Tuesday, June 14 An Acoustic Evening with LyIe Lovett and John Hiatt Tuesday, June 21 Ray LaMontagne and The Pariah Dogs with Brandi Carlile and The Secret Sisters Friday, July 1 Alison Krauss and Union St,itioi featuring Jerry Douglas Wednesday, July 20 The Decemberists with Typhoon Friday, July 22 Slightly Stoopid with Rebelution. Shwayze and Cisco Adler [Sidebar] TUBING THE BOISE RIVER PARKING The lot is open from 10 a.m.-7:30 p.m. and parking costs $5 Mondays-Thursdays and $6 Fridays-Sundays and on holidays.

SHUTTLES A shuttle bus runs every hour between the two parks from 1-8 p.m. on weekdays and 1-9 p.m. on weekends and holidays throughout the season. The cost to ride is $3 per person LIFE JACKETS Remember, under state law, any boat must carry personal flotation devices for each person on board, and children age 14 or younger must wear a life jacket at all times BOOZE Don’t do it. Alcolici is prohibited on the river RENTALS While many Treasure Valley residents have their own rafts or tubes, rentals are available from a number of businesses Alpenglow 2314 Bogus Basin Road, Boise 208-331-2628, alpenglowidaho.com Boise Army-Navy 4924 Chinden Blvd Garden City, 208-322-0660 Boise State Campus Recreation Outdoor Program 1515 University Drive, Boise 208-426-1131. rec.boisestate.edu Epley’s 4049 Eckert Road (Barber Park), Boise 208-577-4584. epleys.com/boiselocation Idaho River Sports 3100 W. Pleasanton Ave., Boise, 208-336-4844. idahoriversports.com USE THIS QR CODE TO VISIT BOISE WEEKLY’S TREASURE VALLEY WINE TOUR MAP Darr, Deanna

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