Kelly Clarkson Does Not Deserve To Be Performing At A Houston Mall

kelly clarkson

Posted by on 06/28/2011 at 12:52 PM Videos

The Popdust Files: kelly clarkson

Here are some things that don’t deserve to happen to Kelly Clarkson:

- Perform at a mall in Houston–the Houston Galleria, to be specific–at a Microsoft store opening. Or before that, glorified Tupperware parties. It’s sweet, but it’s also like the setup of a joke that ends on Behind the Music.
- Have concert reviews in which “chub sweating,” “swamp butt” and “dat ass” are mentioned almost as much as Kelly’s actual performance.
- Have her album be pushed back one month, as is rumored.

See, we’re rooting for Kelly Clarkson. Ever since Clive Davis decided My December was somehow the dregs of music, she’s been doing all she can to recover, whether that means getting Katy Perry to polish her up on “I Do Not Hook Up,” getting Ryan Tedder to polish her away on “Already Gone” or destroying both speakers and subtlety on “My Life Would Suck Without You.” What else is Kelly expected to do? We can’t speak for her upcoming material, because all we’re allowed to hear is a Jason Aldean song that’s good but seems like chasing Carrie and Taylor. Kelly’s not in the promo game. There are no 15-second clips.

So let’s go back to these clips, because they’re what’s granted us. Even though Clarkson’s more than outgrown American Idol, we’ll use a TV metaphor anyway. It’s the final 4, and she’s Allison Iraheta or Syesha Mercado. The producers are set upon a finale that doesn’t include her, but she’ll sing the hell out of her exit song, for her own dignity if not for acknowledgement. Kelly’s in better voice than ever, and in an ideal world, these performances would make her a superstar again. Alas.

Check Us Out On

MOST RECENT

43rd Annual Academy Of Country Music Awards All-Star Jam

From Jewel to Jim Carrey: 17 Celebrities Who Have Famously Lived Out of Their Car

They were meant for fame, and fame was meant for them...

Angelina Flipper 1

Angelina Jolie’s Choice: A Renowned Plastic Surgeon’s Take

By going public, Jolie has brought widespread attention to an issue that does have controversial elements.

Nick Carter Reality Show

Welcome Back, Carter: Nick Might Be Getting His Own Reality Series

They better not be playin' games with our hearts.

Psy Imposter Cannes

Fake Psy Delights and Enchants the Cannes Film Festival

This man is dressed like Psy, but he is not Psy.

4minute What's Your Name Feature

K-pop Chart Report: 4minute Finally Hits No. 1 With "What's Your Name?"

Is anybody else surprised at how well this 4minute song is doing, or is it just us?

avrilmanson copy

Turns Out Avril Lavigne Shaved Her Head Because of Marilyn Manson

What FOOLS we were thinking it was because of Skrillex all this time...

Kesha Drank Her Own Pee

Last Night on MTV, Ke$ha Drank Her Own Pee (and Filmed It)

Ke$ha finally put her money where her mouth is: She drank her own pee.

Taylor Swift Diet Coke Challenge

FYI: If You're Artistic, You Could Win $10,000 and Meet Taylor Swift

It feels like the perfect night/To design a t-shirt.

cody copy

New Music From Cody Simpson and Austin Mahone Is Coming Very Soon

Like your boys, cute, talented and from YouTube? Then we've got good news for you.

Paris Hilton Feature

Cash Money Records Releasing Paris Hilton's Long-Awaited Sophomore Album

Paris Hilton is about to reignite her pop career and start DJing again. You've been warned.

SWEET ... MORE POPDUST!

Sign Up for the Popdust Daily

Signing up means you have accepted our Privacy Policy